The Journey So Far

Original post: June 3, 2010 at 10:29 pm on blog: http://vialofdreams.wordpress.com

I am finally no longer overweight according to the BMI scale. Though the journey doesn’t end here, and a number on a scale is just that: a number, it feels immensely good to have accomplished such a daunting task.

Weight issues have been haunting me since I was little. All through middle school, when kids I was friends with would make funny remarks about my weight, high school, where class-mates would advise I should lose weight, as well as college and my adult life until I decided to make a change, my appearance and my weight have caused hurtful wounds in my self-esteem. It wasn’t easy, I tried many “solutions” like dieting, not eating after 6pm, Weight Watchers, inefficient workouts, but none of them gave a permanent resolution to my ongoing struggle, and each time I ended up re-gaining all the weight I had lost and then some. Working at the company I just left made things worse. For a sweet-toothed person like myself, that place was a trap. Free sodas? Bring them on! I took full advantage of the three sodas a day rule. Mountain Dew, Dr. Pepper, Root Beer, Fanta, apple and apple-cranberry juice, Cherry Coke, Vanilla Coke, you know … all the stuff with high fructose corn syrup I was so oblivious to. Not to mention, when I started working there I was still on omnivore, so meat was regularly on the menu. Not just any meat, but Puckers, Oriental express, barbecue ribs, steaks and burgers. In addition, I was ignorant to unhealthy additives, such as hydrogenated oils, partially hydrogenated oils, aspartame, corn syrup and such. Calculating portion sizes was also not on top of my list. Not to mention, the birth control I was using at the time was known to cause massive weight gain in women, a warning I ignored for two whole years.

One day, I woke up and weight a daunting 217 lbs, more than I had ever weighed in my life. For a 5’6” tall this number categorized me as obese. When I asked a nurse at my clinic what I could do, he just blamed it on my aging and told me to get used to it. My doctor however advised I got off the birth control shot and started an exercise routine. I was desperate to overcome this issue. I got tired of being denied privileges because I was overweight. After moving to the United States, I gained a grand total of 68 lbs, and felt awkward walking down the street. I didn’t want to send my mom pictures in shame of what I had become. The media only fed these feelings; seeing all the beautiful, skinny women made me depressed, and though I tried not to show it, I was hurting… very much.
On January 14th I signed up at Life Time Fitness. I figured it was a nice place, had a pool and other amazing amenities, plus it was across the street from our apartment complex. Once there, I took a Team Weight Loss course of 12 weeks, with nutrition coaching every week and a workout three times a week. I started eating better foods, counted everything I ate; I learned how to live a healthy lifestyle, worked out 6 times a week and started losing weight fast. My class was amazed by the speed of my weight loss; their words and attitude gave me motivation. I wasn’t about to disappoint them at the following weigh-in! And so it continued. Each week, I lost an average of 2 to 5 lbs and felt incredible. My amazing boyfriend and wonderful friends have been very supportive, and having a strong support-system makes all the difference. You have no idea just how grateful I am for each and every one of you, and I am so proud when I hear *you* are making a change in your life.

This is not a diet. This is not temporary. Deciding to live a healthier life is not a “seasonal job”. You have to do this full-time to see and maintain the results. I am now 64 lbs lighter than I was in January. During my last doctor’s visit last week, the nurse (different nurse from the one I spoke with back in the day) looked at my chart and asked me how I did it, then she gave me a hug and congratulated me. The doctor asked if I had taken diet pills or supplements, and I was proud to say I have not. I am leading a healthy lifestyle, and that is all that is takes.

Do I get discouraged? Oh yes. Sometimes, I feel I cannot do this anymore, I want to quit and I just want to curl up in a ball and cry. The key is not to stop when this happens. You have to think “I am in control! Not hunger, not food, not the negative feelings. I *can* do this. I have so far, so I can keep it up!” Then, set attainable goals, and it is such an amazing feeling to achieve them, and it is even more rewarding when you go beyond you expectations.